Who Says Antiques Can't Be Fun: Florence, Colorado

Who says antiques can't be fun? As most everyone knows, Florence--the antiques capital of Colorado is gearing up for the 88th Annual Pioneer Days, held Sept. 18 to 20. This year the event will have a bit of steampunk flair.

There will be a steampunk ball street dance and Punktique. Annually, bargain hunters descend on Florence for Junktique--a cavalcade of bargains, antiques and good old-fashioned junk. New this year is Punktique--and open air steampunk market held at the same time as Junktique.

There are already lots of signs in Florence's windows welcoming steampunkers.

And a few windows that prove: antiques can be fun.

This was taken at Legends and Lace. This dude is taking a bath and strumming a melody: Love Always, according to his sheet music.

Ah! Seems innocent enough. Let's "pan" over to the other side of the window.

Oh my! You can't see it very well in the picture, but that there fancy lady is holding a cigarette holder and some money in her hand. And there's a pile of money on the table. My goodness! That dude is getting ready for an evening with the sporting ladies. The window is quite the homage to racy ladies--and I love it.

Let's move down Florence's Main St. a little. Someone with a warped sense of humor was busy at the Iron Gate Antique Mall.

Looks innocuous enough. A bunch of grates hanging on the wall in the window. Yeah, it's a little steampunk. But you can't really see the sign in the right side of the picture. Some joker put up a sign that reads: Isn't This A "Grate" Wall? Honestly, I am appalled by that sign. When I find out who put it up there--I will tell them that antiques are a serious business and nothing to joke about.

What else is in the window at Iron Gate? Well, it's an homage to pioneers with a little steampunk thrown in.

Yes, someone had the audacity to dress a nice pioneer woman up, plunk a steampunk-inspired hat on her noggin and then give her a suitcase, a bear skull and a badminton racquet to fend off all the animals in the Old West (pictured in the background). She was placed in a Victorian-era baby buggy with a gizmo and light bulb-- to steampunk-power her buggy across the lone prairie.

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At the top of this picture, one can see the wheels of her steampunk-powered buggy, which also has a big chain and anchor in the back. Why you ask? Just because.

There's some more taxidermied animals and a nice display of antique wheels. The same joker who put that "grate" wall sign up, decided to put a HOT WHEELS sign on that big rusty John Deere wheel.

There's a few more signs in the window. Rumor has it these window decorators were also going after that Burma Shave sign ambience. And rumor has it that a few more of those corny and appalling signs might appear in the window before Pioneer Days. I hear that one of the signs that might pop up is SO silly that people might gasp in shock.

All this nonsense really has to stop. People will start thinking antiques are fun. Wait, they are!

See you all at Pioneer Days, Junktique and Punktique. How will you know who I am? I'll be wearing a red rose. No, actually, I'll be wearing a taxidermied skunk with a sign around my neck that reads: SteamSkunk.